We can stop here! This is bat country!
It's amazing how quickly people can go from happy to sad.
I thought back to when I was working in the George and I heard the quote "It's amazing how fast that guy can go from hero to zero". I must have thought something of it at the time, the most likely thought was that I didn't understand it.
I was doing my final class for today and the kids were in pretty high spirits, I'd managed to knock most of the whiteboard off of the wall and this was causing much hilarity in the room. As I stood there with a chair trying to bang the nail in (I don't know the Korean for hammer) I heard a loud yelp behind me.
The loudest of the group that had become particularly animated throughout the whole experience had gone suddenly quiet, I hit her on the head a couple of times with a book to see if she was OK (men are no good at consoling women, even worse at consoling little girls). The tears started flowing and I found out through the use of mime that she had caught her finger between two desks as the banged together: who said all those charade parties were a waste of time? The tears started flowing down her face, and all I could think about was laughing. I did not, however, as I am a professional - I moved on quickly and ignored her and didn't ask her for any answers for the rest of the lesson. At this point I told them all to line up before leaving, never once making eye contact with the poor wee lass.
Aaaaaah, it's good to be a grown up.
posted by Alanowski @ 8:34 pm
5 Comments:
F and L in L Vegas?
keith stewarty stewart
Stoobs pulls one out of the bag and moves onto the high score table (having any score is on the table).
The Score table shall be seen as a link at the end of each month.
Well done to the Keithy Meister, one of Mr Owski's favourite films, watch out for ones involving the Dude.
Keep on rocking everyone.
My story is so similar to yours, Alan. Or possibly I've misunderstood your story completely. You be the judge.
To update you, after recovering sufficiently from bubonic plague I returned to work to discover, firstly, everything had fallen apart without me and secondly, the Allo Allo thing raise about £350 for Children In Need. I was feeling both necessary and public spirited, and it was in such a mood that I went to give blood tonight.
I arrived at the Prestonpans Community Cave and was told, in no uncertain terms (leave me alone, I like cliche), that I was unclean. The plague virus remains in my bloodstream! I was rejected as unfit for charity.
While my cousin Stacey, who's having an engagement party on Saturday, dripped girlishly into her bag for half an hour, I sat and played one of the crap games on my crap phone. As I played I couldn't help but overhear two children playing nearby.
"My name's Emily."
"Why do you have a bear?"
"His name is Thomas."
"I'm a daning girl, I'm a dancing girl."
"I'm going to chase you."
You probably suspect now, as I did, that these children are medicated. No. They are in fact normal. None of their parents considered any of this conversation to be strange. This was confirmed to me when the mother of the girl who wasn't Emily left, she said to the mother of the girl who was Emily that her daughter (not Emily) was "three, going on thirty-three".
Either this woman has a history of premature dementia in her family, or she doesn't meet a lot of thirty-three year-olds.
It was then that I realised a profound truth. I am ill-suited to be either a nonce or a parent. I lack that peculiarity of thinking which makes one find children fascinating. Frankly, they frighten me and I am convinced that giving them money only encourages their oddball behaviour.
I knew the futility of fund raising for children. For me it will always be like donating money to clone Hitler -- funny at the time, but with unpleasant consequences.
So in one day I enjoyed dizzying heights and stark lows.
Keith's top tip of the day:
If you're being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire.
They're trained for that.
Also, if you're planning on running away from a police dog, avoid wearing thick elbow-length padded gloves. This appears to enrage them -- the people I've seen on information films being savaged by dogs are always wearing them.
DFP.
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